Reflection on the 21st Sunday in Ordinary Time

When I first sat with these readings I connected immediately with the first reading where God is inviting people back to fidelity and a closer relationship. And I think this might be what happened to the tribes of Israel when they were living in the land of the Amorites. Throughout history, people who are enslaved or held captive by an overwhelming force try, for reasons of survival, not to incur the anger or ire of this powerful presence in their life. It happened in the times of the Vikings with people who were captives of a conquering force, it happened in France and other countries during the Second World War, and it is happening in places around the world today. And God knows and understands how people can feel a need to try to serve more than one leader. And so God calls them back, and they see how they have wandered off and recommit themselves to serving God and acknowledging his power to save them and free them. Perhaps this is the origin of the phrase, “All who wander are not lost.”

Since the age of 15 I have been grateful to know a God who always invites and waits patiently to welcome someone back when they wander off. When my father died and I was 14, I spent almost a year at Mass, week after week, telling God how angry I was, how much I missed my dad, and how I did not understand why God allowed such things to happen. And then one day it was clear that this God had been sitting there patiently listening to me, caring about me and never punishing me for my lack of faith or trust or my months of questioning and complaining. In some way I had wandered off, probably like some wounded animal, and God stayed with me and waited for me to feel God’s presence and accept the consolation available to me.

And so, when I read the Gospel and heard about the grumbling disciples and the decision of some to return to their former way of life when things seemed too hard, it was easy to see myself as possibly one of them, rather than one of the disciples who stayed and never wavered. And I wondered if those who left returned at a later date, after more things had taken place with Jesus and they saw how welcoming and forgiving Jesus was toward all he met.

Last Sunday I read Richard Rohr’s reflection where he noted that “a true mentor guides people into their problems and through them. It feels a bit messy and wild, but also wonderful in some way. A wise mentor leads someone to their own center and to the Center, but by circuitous paths, using their two steps backward to lead them three steps forward. It may look unproductive, but it is really the wisdom path of God.” I really like that as a description of the wisdom path of God. It seems so understanding of our human nature. And it may be a good description for us as we seek to understand our emerging future and there is not yet some single, clear forward path ahead of us.

And it may be through that circuitous path that we come to find a permanent home with God in the center and each of us can say, “We have come to believe and are convinced” that Jesus is the Holy One of God who is ever at our side.

And that left me with a good bit of time to reflect on the second reading, one of my least favorites as a feminist. While it is crystal clear to me that every person should try to love as Jesus loved, without regard for people’s past sins or their occupation or status, it is difficult when it seems that men and women are being asked to do different things. My cynical self can say that it is because women are more naturally relational and care about others, so perhaps they do not need such explicit directions. Or perhaps it was because women had little choice because of their place in society at the time that letter to the Ephesians was written. But, whatever the case, we are all called to live in love and love others as ourselves and recognize the divine in each person. Sometimes that call is focused on our love and treatment of others, and, at other times, it is a reminder to care for ourselves as Jesus would care for us. Jesus took time away when he needed it; he walked wholeheartedly into his future, but he took the time to stay connected to his center and renew the strength to continue his journey. We are called to that same standard of care. And that is never easy when the needs of the world and others are so present to us every day. For me, it is such a reminder of the value and importance of the spaces at the Motherhouse and elsewhere that provide those “away” spaces of peace and renewal to so many people. The work that continues through all those who leave any retreat space refreshed and energized is sorely needed in our world.